LIMERICK about FSA ‘guarantees’

by Dr. Ros Altmann

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Parliament decided one day
To create a Regulator – the great FSA
Which would fine financial firms
Who used unfair terms
Or promoted products in some careless way.

This regulator had powers to fear
Forcing compensation, costing companies dear
On any product providers
Or financial advisers
Who failed to make risk warnings clear.

The FSA decided to publish information
Giving occupational pension education
It produced booklets in series
To answer members’ queries
When worried about their scheme’s situation

What if my firm might go bust?
Was a question that many discussed
Do I need to transfer out?
Could my pension be worth nowt?
And where is advice I can trust?

They read the FSA booklets for free
And some leaflets from the DWP
Which said ‘Never mind ‘low-risk’
Your pensions are ‘no-risk’
They’re safe and provide a guarantee’

So their confidence was duly restored
And the members were all reassured
Told by Government and FSA
That company pensions were OK
Their futures were surely secured.

Then along came some members of ASW
Saying ‘Excuse me, we don’t want to trouble you.
But these guarantees are a con
On wind-up our pensions have gone
We need compensation, at the double too.’

Said the FSA chief, ‘Don’t blame me.
Just ‘cos we said ‘guarantee’
It’s a shame for each member
But you have to remember
We’re protected by full immunity.’

Such double standards are hard to comprehend
From a Regulator on whom many depend
Misinformation of the worst kind –
Glass houses and stones spring to mind
Refusing compensation’s impossible to defend!